Trip Advisor's Strangest Complaints Part 3

I get to write a lot of fun things while doing this blog. Telling stories about traveling with my kids, exploring new and different places, or even relating personal stories such as how Lori and I met, is a great way to spend my days. Without a doubt though, the most fun I have while writing is doing the research for my Trip Advisor's Strangest Complaints series. The bizarre things that people feel the need to complain about never fail to put a huge smile on my face, even if it does come at the cost of a little bit of my faith in mankind. One day people will stop complaining about silly things, but until that day, it's good to know that I'll always have plenty of material to keep me entertained.

If you haven't read the first two instalments of this series, you might want to start here:

Trip Advisor's Strangest Complaints

Trip Advisor's Strangest Complaints Part 2

And now here's the latest collection of...

Trip Advisor's Strangest Complaints - Part 3

"I wanted a nice view so I requested a high floor, but they put me on the 55th floor! That's too high. Also, the window didn't open. What if there had been a fire?"
- So your plan in case of a fire was to go out the 55th floor window? I always wondered where Superman stayed when he was in New York.

"I thought that housekeeping had stolen my wallet, but when I complained to the front desk they didn't seem too interested. It gave me a real negative feel towards the hotel, even though I later found my wallet in my wife's suitcase."
- This seems a little fishy to me. Every married man I know would assume that his wife had taken his wallet long before considering housekeeping as a suspect.

"The manager said that he gave me an upgrade, but I didn't feel any more special in my new room."
-That's really what the upgrade is about isn't it? Feeling more special? Maybe the manager should have sent flowers and chocolates.

"I wished for the bed to be bigger so it could be fitting all four of us"
- I really, really hope this guy was traveling with kids.

Yeah...something like that.......

"When we got downstairs for breakfast all the food was gone. This ruined our entire vacation!"
- This person takes the saying "Breakfast is the most important meal of the day" far to literally.

"The hotel is across the street from a fire hall but they look nothing like the firemen from the calendars."
- Apparently my wife now writes Trip Advisor reviews.

Lori's dream vehicle. A truck full of firemen with Batman strapped to the front!

"Although it was a nice hotel, I didn't really feel like I got my 140 cents worth."
- Did you use any toilet paper? Because that should be enough to break even on a rate like that.

"While sitting in the bar the manager threatened us with erection if we didn't quiet down."
- It's probably best that I don't touch this one...

"Housekeeping only took 8 of the cases of empties from the corner of the room."
- Only took 8? How were you even conscious enough to write this?

Finally, this guy may have a valid complaint, but I would have loved to see the hotel manager's face when he read this one:

"The hotel's walls were paper thin. We could hear everything from the amorous activities of the couple next door to the animals outside. At least, I hope the animals were outside."

Written by Steve Pratt

The Jelly Belly Factory Tour

There's only a few different ways that you can win an actual "Father of the Year" award from your children. One is to be rich and let them do whatever they want...there's no chance of that happening in our house. Another way is to spend every spare moment doting on your children, focusing solely on their spiritual, physical and educational needs while foregoing your own personal health and well-being. Strike two for my kids. The third method however, is a far easier path than the other two. Remembering that the only votes you need for this award are those of your children, the simplest way to be declared "Father of the Year" is to take your kids to a candy factory. Since Willy Wonka is fictional, this is how we found ourselves on the Jelly Belly factory tour. 

Now based out of Fairfield, California, the Jelly Belly company can be traced back almost 150 years to a small candy store in Belleville, Illinois. Gustav Goelitz began the company in 1869 and while the business was successful enough to be passed down from generation to generation, it wasn't until almost 100 years later in 1966 that the company was truly noticed. Sometimes though, it's who notices you that makes all the difference. In this case, the person doing the noticing was California Governor Ronald Regan, and when Governor Regan became President Regan in 1980, his trusted jar of Jelly Belly beans made the move with him to Washington, D.C. Eventually the world couldn't help but notice the ever present jar of jelly beans in the president's office and the Jelly Belly company was finally brought to the attention of a candy loving country.

Regan inauguration captured in jelly beans

Jelly Belly relocated to Fairfield, California in 1986, giving them 27 years to get things smoothed out before our visit so I was fairly sure that everything would be prepared for our arrival. Coincidentally, 27 years is also the amount of lead time I need to get my kids out of bed in the morning, although I will say that the phrase "It's time to go to the candy factory" helps speed things along immensely. We arrived at the Jelly Belly factory just after it opened at 9 am. There were plans to take some pictures outside the building before heading in, but apparently one member of our group wasn't willing to wait any longer before getting inside.

Upon entering, the first thing you're going to notice is long, roped off queue area. It looks like it's designed to hold hundreds of people (very similar to the line when I'm signing autographs), but early on a Sunday morning there were only about 20 people in line for a tour. Realistically this is about a perfect number for the factory tour as it allows everybody easy sightlines to everything and makes the distribution of samples much more expedient. Tours leave every 15 minutes and last about 40 minutes each. Fashion note: everybody on the factory tour must wear a hat. If you didn't happen to bring one of your own, you'll be allocated one of these premium pieces of headgear...

The tour takes place on an elevated walkway high above the factory floor. As our visit happened to fall on a weekend, the factory wasn't operating, but it was still very impressive to see the amount and types of machinery that go into producing the jelly beans. There are monitors mounted all along the walkway and at each stop we were shown a video clip about what happens in that area of the factory. I found it really interesting, but if the tour guide ever found anybody's interest waning all she had to do was start a sentence with "Now we're going to let you try a sample of...." and everybody's head would snap back around to see what kind of treat was being offered. We got to try jelly beans both before and after the shell was applied, and some new and different flavors that aren't widely available just yet. At the end of the tour we were each given a souvenir bag of Disney jelly beans and released into the gift shop. By the way, there is no photography allowed on the tour, but they do take your picture before you start and you are given the option to buy a copy at the conclusion of your tour.

The gift shop had a great sampling of all their products, including stuff that is only available at the factory itself. My daughters bought some Harry Potter jelly beans to take home to their friends, my son found the free samples of fudge being given out at the chocolate counter, and Lori and I loaded up on bags of rejects. Jelly Belly runs a pretty tight ship when it comes to the quality of their product, so it's only natural that there are plenty of beans produced that don't make it into the final product. They package these beans into two pound bags and sell them as a product called "Belly Flops", my new favorite road trip snack!

 
Then came the moment I'd been waiting for. My daughter came up to me and said "Dad...I've got something for you." Expecting a band to play and confetti to drop at any moment, I began to get my acceptance speech ready for my Father of the Year award, only to find out that what my daughter had were some jelly beans she had picked out for me from the sample bar in some rather unique flavors. I was presented with three jelly beans to try; one dog food flavored, one rotten egg flavored, and one barf flavored. Not exactly the kind of reward you'd figure would come with a Father of the Year award, but I reasoned that perhaps it was one last test to confirm my worthiness of the title. Dutifully I tried each of the three beans, and although I suspect that some of the flavoring may be psychological, each of the beans really were as awful as their names would suggest.

Amused by the anguish on my face, my children headed back off to the sample bar to see what else they could make Dad eat, but my patience was growing thin. I pulled my wife aside and asked her when I could expect to receive my prestigious award. After all, I had brought my children to a candy factory. This should be a done deal by now. My wife looked at me blankly and asked if I remembered taking my daughter to the dentist just before our trip. Of course I did. That $7K bill for her braces was the reason that we were in San Francisco and not on a beach in Aruba or somewhere more exotic. What did that have to do with anything?

And that's when I found out that people with braces aren't allowed to eat jelly beans. Who knew? I mean, thinking back I did remember my daughter giving me all her samples while we were on the tour, but I just assumed that it was because she was so proud of me and my impending Father of the Year status. Apparently those words being muttered under her breath weren't actually words of admiration. I had brought my candy loving daughter to a candy factory full of free samples where she wasn't actually allowed to try anything. Whoops. Looks like another year of winning the "Worst Father of the Year" award. That makes 15 years in a row now. Fortunately I have a speech permanently prepared for that honor.

Written by Steve Pratt

The Most Important Thing to Know About Six Flags Annual Passes

You can photobomb your family's pictures...

Written by Steve Pratt

Cars Land Tips - Brought to You by the Letter S

Last summer we finally got our first look at Cars Land. I know, I know. For Disney fanatics we sure took our sweet time getting around to checking it out, but sometimes you just have to wait for a deal. What counts is that we did finally get there, and once we got a chance to try everything out, we loved it.

Our favorite ride was Radiator Springs Racers. Disney did a great job building this ride around their Cars franchise and we enjoyed every second of our time on the ride. Unfortunately, for every minute we got to spend on the ride we had to spend 20 minutes standing in line. Therefore, since I'm a helpful kind of guy (don't laugh), I feel it's my duty to provide you with some tips to both shorten your wait time and make the most of your time on the ride. Since today is the Wordless Wednesday Blog Hop at Focused on the Magic and today's theme is the letter 'S', I'll be following Deb's theme to provide these valuable tips to you.   Ready? Here we go:

#1 - Single Rider Line

It took us about half as long to get through the single rider line as it did to get through the stand-by queue. Granted that still involves an investment of at least an hour, but that's way better than the two hours plus that the main line was taking.

#2 - Sunglasses

It's aesthetic, but if you're going to be bombing around the countryside in a fancy sports car, you really need to look like you belong in that car. Sunglasses give a person a "I know what I'm doing here" vibe, which explains why I never wear them.

#3 - Seat Selection

If you have a choice, never sit behind the girls with long hair. 

#4 - Sportmanship

Just remember that you're not going to win every race. It's nothing to get upset about.

#5 - Selebrate with a Shake

(Don't question my spelling!) Just outside of Radiator Springs Racers is Flo's V8 Cafe, one of the few places inside California Adventures that you can get milkshakes. They're pretty good milkshakes too. Of course they're even better if you're celebrating a big win over other racers. I wonder what that feels like?

This post is a part of Wordless Wednesday over at Focused on the Magic. If you didn't get here from there, you should really head on over and check out some of the fantastic people that hang out there on Wednesdays. Most of them could probably be described as Spectacularly Scriptive and Sophisticated, although a couple of them are Slightly Strange and Silly. Guess which camp I fall in?

Written by Steve Pratt

5 Reasons We're Not Very Good at Road Tripping

I have a blog I like to read called Tips on Road Tripping. It's about a family of six who take these crazy long drives across the country and stop in some of the strangest places imaginable, all while making it look like they're having the time of their lives (I highly suspect that someone in that family has taken a Photoshop class because they always look so happy). I enjoy following Joe, Deborah and their family on their adventures, and while I've always said that road tripping wasn't for me, secretly I've always wondered if they were on to something special. 

Fast forward to this years Christmas break and circumstances (aka my daughter deciding that she doesn't want to fly any more) led us to plan our first real road trip (I don't count the One Direction version). At least we called it a road trip. The Tips for Road Tripping gang would probably laugh at a simple 18 hour drive, but for us it seemed like an enormous endeavour. 18 hours would easily be the longest period of time that we'd ever spent in a car together, excluding the time that we got lost driving to Edmonton. So to be more accurate, it would be the longest period of time we'd ever intentionally spent in a car together.  That's a scary thought to dwell on while loading luggage into the van. 

We probably could have found a more comfortable seating arrangement

So how was it? Well we survived. Truthfully it was nowhere near as bad as I thought it was going to be.  We split the drive in two and stayed a night in Portland in both directions leaving only 9 hour shifts behind the wheel which really didn't seem too terrible. Still, I'm not sure that it's an excursion that we'll be in a rush to repeat. Despite what our friends at Tips on Road Tripping say, I'm not sure that road tripping is for everyone, and I'm pretty sure it's not for us. Here's five reasons I'm fairly certain we're not well suited to the road tripping lifestyle:

#1 - I like to be in control so I don't share the driving

I'd like to share the driving, really I would, but there's something in me that won't let me. Truth be told, pilots are lucky I let them fly the plane without me being in the cockpit offering suggestions. I seem to have some sort of control fetish, and that makes for really long days behind the wheel. It will only get worse next year when the boy is eligible to get his drivers license. There's zero chance of me relinquishing my grip on the wheel at that point. Plus there's the rule that the driver controls the radio, and we all know why that's important don't we? 

#2 - Apparently I drive at the world's most inconvenient speed

I'm not a speed demon, but if the speed limit on a road is 70 mph then I usually keep my pace somewhere between 70-80 mph. That seems reasonable to me, but for about 50% of the drivers on the I-5 last week, that's the speed a semi-truck climbing up a 45 degree incline while pulling a trailer full of anchors should be traveling and I must be some sort of pace car to be moving as slowly as I was. The other half of the drivers obviously thought that I was some kind of meth-fueled, speed crazed Canadian who had no respect for American speed limits. Add in the fact that I actually signal when I change lanes and I think everybody was completely confused by my driving habits.

#3 - The freedom to stop wherever you want

Most people who like road tripping will tell you that being able to stop and explore things that catch your eye is one of the best parts of driving instead of flying. I respectfully disagree. I'm a man, and my goal is to get from point A to point B as quickly as possible. Having to stop every time my wife spots something of interest doesn't speed things along at all. Besides, the only thing that ever catches my wife's eye while we're driving are outlet malls. Well, that and the occasional road sign which everybody feels the need to scream at the top of their lungs causing me to nearly drive the van into the ditch.

#4 - The service isn't as good as flying

Those of you who think it's a hassle trying to get a drink on an airline should try and get somebody to pass you a Diet Coke in my van. Three kids sitting in the back with their headphones on, and no matter how much I wave and motion, nobody is looking up from their iPad. Unless of course we drive past the YOLO county limit sign. That they all miraculously see. Lori isn't much better as a nine hour drive is the perfect opportunity for a nine hour Candy Crush marathon that means all drink requests have to "just wait until I finish this level". 

#5 - You don't get miles while driving. 

Every time I passed a sign detailing the remaining distance to San Francisco I would mentally figure out how many miles we would earn to our frequent flyer account if we stopped and flew from right at that point. With Alaska running double miles on most of their Bay Area routes right now, it was a little depressing to keep figuring out what we were missing out on. Fortunately, we shouldn't have to miss out on it again. After two 18 hour drives my daughter has decided that she's perfectly fine with flying again. Apparently road trips are the miracle cure for fear of flying. I wonder if Joe and Deborah know about this?

Written by Steve Pratt

It's A Wrap - Why I Didn't Buy Matthew McConaughey's Shirt

When my shoulder forced a visit to the hospital in Los Angeles, I was very grateful to have my wife along. She made sure that I was buckled in the car, shifted gears for me, and checked my blind spots whenever I had to change lanes. When we got to the hospital, Lori filled out all the paperwork and made sure I was comfortable while the doctors tried to figure out what was wrong. Having her along was a complete blessing and for a couple of hours her attention was focused solely on me.

Or so I thought. Turns out that while I wasn't looking Lori might have been sneaking a peek or two in other directions. Sure she paid attention to me while we were in the hospital, but as soon as I was discharged and it was time to leave, the truth came out. "You know, on the way here I noticed this great little store that I'd love to stop at..." What can I say? The girl never stops shopping.

The shop Lori spotted while I was racing to the hospital is called "It's A Wrap!". It looks like any other Salvation Army type clothing store, but it's actually a clearance house for movie wardrobes. After a movie or TV show finishes shooting the clothes that are worn during the filming are consigned to It's A Wrap for sale. It's A Wrap attaches a tag to each piece of clothing so it can be traced back to the film or show that it came from. Display racks have a header card on them so you know that everything on that rack came from the specified show.

This was far more interesting than most places Lori makes me stop. I've always thought that I have movie star looks, now I could have movie star clothes! I began searching for a shirt that might have belonged to somebody famous that would look good on me. Spying a rack of clothes from The Lincoln Lawyer I got excited. If a shirt could make Matthew McConaughey look good, imagine what it could do for me! I searched the rack but didn't really find anything and then it dawned on me. Silly Steve....Matthew McConaughey doesn't wear shirts in movies! What was I thinking.

I checked some other displays but apparently movie stars don't come in my shape or size. Denzel Washington's stuff from Flight? Too small. Nathan Fillion's Castle wardrobe? Maybe if I invested in a good pair of Spanx. There was some stuff there from Breaking Bad, but I'm really not hip enough to pull that kind of look off. And so it went until I found some stuff in my size leftover from an old Kevin James movie. Great....

Therein lies the problem with It's a Wrap. If you find a great shirt, you can't ask if they have it in another size. What the studio sends them is what they have, and while it's fascinating to look around, the odds of you finding exactly what you want in your size aren't super high. Unless of course you're a size zero supermodel, as I suspect a high number of my readers are. Then you might have a little more luck.

Speaking of size zero supermodels, Lori was having a lot more luck than I was (That should keep me out of the doghouse for a little while). Of course, she was spending all her time in the shoe section where $600 Manolo Blahnik shoes were marked down to $300. Carrie Bradshaw would have jumped at the deal, but fortunately for me Lori knows our budget limits very well. The only purchase we ended up making was a black, Nike jacket from the movie Juno for $7. It was supposed to be my jacket, but I haven't seen it since the day we bought it. I suspect that somebody has decided it looks better on them than it does on me. I can't say I disagree with them. 

From a man who seriously dislikes shopping, It's A Wrap was a lot of fun. Even though you know most of the clothes came off background extras and minor cast members, it's fun to hold up things and try and remember if you saw a major movie star wearing it during their last film. Sure it was a little depressing that all Hollywood people are in better shape than me, but to be honest I kind of knew that anyways. Spending an hour or so sorting through their castoff clothing was a fun and (considering I had just come from the hospital where industrial strength pain killers were administered to help me deal with my shoulder) painless experience.

Written by Steve Pratt

Life Lessons via Maroon 5

As much as I'd looked forward to it happening, I can honestly say the moment didn't unfold as I'd envisioned it. Of course I'd never really settled on a singular vision of what this event would look like. Some things I was fairly sure about. Being on the road was a given. Things not going according to plan always seemed like a likely occurrence. The fact that we were outdoors came as a bit of a surprise, although not as much as the fact that we were standing in the middle of a driving rain storm and not bothering to seek shelter.

Adam Levine standing at the bottom of a hill and telling us it was time to go home.....That part was new.

Happy, waiting for the show to start

In hindsight, buying tickets for an outdoor concert by Maroon 5 and Kelly Clarkson for late September was probably not my best idea. The fall weather in the Pacific Northwest lends itself more towards splashing in puddles than sitting on lawn blankets, and we're not exactly known as a family of outdoor enthusiasts at the best of times. Still, the combination of two artists that I really enjoy with a chance to finally see the Gorge Amphitheater at a really good price (under $40) was too much to resist. 

My kids on the other hand, probably could have resisted. Perhaps demonstrating that they understand weather forecasts better than I do, there was definitely some hesitation on their part after the words "High winds and driving rain" kept getting repeated on the radio. One of them was even bold enough to ask whether or not this trip was a "good idea", forcing me to take the time to explain that "Weather forecasts are usually exaggerated and it'll probably clear up by showtime. Besides, what's a little rain when it comes to seeing a concert? You know back when I was your age...", but I never got to finish that thought. You'd think that eye-rolling would be a silent activity, but I assure you that teenagers can do it at a volume that drowns out whatever lesson you're trying to convey. 

Looks like a great day for a concert!

So when we arrived at the Gorge and there was no rain falling, I was feeling rather pleased with myself. Sure it was a little breezy, but in the 25 year history of concerts at the Gorge they've never had to cancel a show for weather and the fact that it was a little difficult to maintain a fancy hairdo didn't seem like it was going to be enough to stop that streak. I allowed myself to relax just a little, figuring that this evening was going to go off as planned. 

Just a little breezy in the parking lot

You see, when I make all these travel plans I do my very best to make sure that everything goes smoothly. It's not because I want to enjoy myself and don't tell, her but it's not because I want Lori to be happy either. I spend hour after hour making and revamping plans because I want my kids to enjoy traveling. It's one of those three golden rules I try and leave them with. Love thy neighbor, honor thy mother and father, and thou shalt not stay home on long weekends. I'm pretty sure it's biblical even if there's some reading between the lines required.

Our arrival at the Gorge was perfectly timed, just as the first singer who I didn't recognize was finishing her set. This left us time to make the hike up to the empty areas at the top of the amphitheater to find a place to set up before Kelly Clarkson hit the stage. It's quite a long walk up to the top of the Gorge, and as we approached the empty areas up at the top it became apparent that the parking lot had been in a sheltered location. The wind and rain blowing over the top of the amphitheater were really quite strong and standing at the top of the hill was something akin to trying to stay upright in a wind tunnel. Coincidentally, the top of the hill was also where all the Porta Pottys were. You want a real travel experience, try using one of those things in the pitch black with 35 mph winds blowing you around. Very, very funny to watch as long as it's not you who needs to go to the bathroom.

We set up in as sheltered a location as we could find near the top of the hill and waited for the show to start. There was plenty of entertainment watching people chasing things around the amphitheater that they weren't hanging onto quite tight enough. A few people were even brave enough to go right to the top of the Gorge and stand against the wind for as long as they could, although more than a couple of them ended up getting blown head over heels down the hillside. It was great to watch, but after a while you couldn't help but notice that the time between sets was stretching really long.

Getting a little tired of waiting...

I guess we all knew it was coming. After the Sugarland incident there's no messing around with concert stages and wind anymore. The first sign was about an hour into the delay when you suddenly saw all the concessions begin to close down. The next indicator was when the roadies started removing band equipment from the stage, and then about ten minutes after that Adam Levine came out on stage with Kelly Clarkson to tell us that the show was cancelled.

3 of us look sad the show is cancelled. One just looks confused.

This left me standing on a hillside in the driving rain, apologizing to my children for dragging them out here on a night like this. I tried to explain that I'd done my research and spent the time making the plans right, but I guess it just wasn't meant to be. In the midst of my apology however my kids stopped me and said "Dad...don't worry about it. This was better than a concert. It was an adventure. It was great!"

That was the moment that made my whole year. Knowing that your kids can enjoy the journey even if the destination is a complete bust takes all the pressure off. Travel isn't always smooth. It's filled with broken down buses and uncomfortable nights spent sleeping on the floor of airports, but if you can consider it all an adventure then you've probably learned all I can teach you about travel. Congratulations kids.

Now let's work on that whole "Honor thy Mother and Father" thing.

Written by Steve Pratt
 

Hotel Loyalty Programs: Confusing the Cards

Without bragging, I consider myself a reasonably bright guy. I did really well in high school, I've got a business degree, and I actually enjoy helping my kids with the word problems and brain teasers that their teachers seem to think makes for great homework assignments. Most of the time if there's something that I decide to set my mind to, I can figure it out. With one exception. Hotel loyalty programs confuse the heck out of me. 

Now let me be clear...I understand the basics of the programs. You stay...you earn points...you redeem points for free nights. That's pretty simple. I also have a working knowledge of some of the more obscure parts of the programs. Point Breaks, Points & Cash Supplements, Axon Rewards...I've worked with each of these in the past and while they can be complicated, I understand how they work. When I say I don't understand the hotel loyalty programs, I'm referring to the names.

You see, Lori and I are members of more than a dozen different hotel programs. Each of these programs have their own unique names for the levels of their loyalty program. During any given stay we may be welcomed to the front desk as a valued Diamond member, a Platinum member, a Gold member, a Red or Blue member (those are not the same program by the way), a Silver member, or a Classic, Preferred or Club member. I believe one program card even refers to me as Tutankhamun the Boy King of Egypt, yet surprisingly that isn't good enough to qualify for a free breakfast.

The importance of keeping these levels straight is huge. Being a gold member at Hilton or Starwood will possibly get you a nicer room and a free breakfast. Pulling up to a Hyatt with a Gold card puts you on the same level as the dog sleeping behind the counter. A Platinum card can get you the world at a Fairmont property, but it will only earn you blank stares from a Best Western agent. Even properties where it sounds like I should be important by being a Gold Ambassador will quickly turn their attention from me if a Platinum Ambassador should arrive at check-in. If a Platinum Royal Ambassador shows up, I believe we're all required to bow. 

Some programs even manage to take shots at you with their loyalty program. Kimpton names the two levels of their program as Inner Circle and In Touch. Since I don't stay with Kimpton enough to qualify for either of those titles, does that make me an Out of Touch member who can't hang with the cool kids? Club Carlson concerns me even more as their top level is called Concierge. Every time I wander through a Radisson I glance over at the concierge desk and wonder if that's an employee or just somebody who's stayed here one too many times.

Even though it confuses me, for now I guess me and my fistful of loyalty cards will just keep on traveling. One day I hope to get a better grip on these programs as there's something slightly embarrassing about standing at the counter of a Marriott and fumbling through a half dozen cards from other chains while looking for the right one. At least most of the time my correct status, whatever it may be, is included on any reservation that I make. I wish I could say the same thing about the airline programs. I guarantee you that I'm not in the Inner Circle of any of those programs.

Written by Steve Pratt

Six Flags Magic Mountain: Is the Flash Pass Worth It?

I'm sure this might come as a bit of a shock to some of you (it did to me) but apparently I don't make all the decisions in this family anymore. It used to be that I would unilaterally select and book all of our family travel arrangements, and never would I be questioned about any of the plans that I made. If there were any shortcomings or flaws in my chosen itineraries they weren't noticed, or at least they didn't get pointed out to me until well after the trip. It was a silent, traveling dictatorship, and it was wonderful.

"Sit down Dad. We need to talk to you about these travel plans...."

Nowadays things are a little different. My kids are beginning to identify and champion the cause of their favorite destinations, pushing for the things that they want in a family vacation. Take our recent trip to Southern California for example. I had decided that we would spend one day at Six Flags Magic Mountain followed by two days at Universal Studios. My older two children, thrill ride addicts that they are, insisted that our time would be better spent in reverse with two days at Six Flags and only one at Universal. Years ago this wouldn't have been an issue as I could have swayed the voting members to my way of thinking with promises of candy. Unfortunately these days my kids have far more disposable income than I do and are perfectly capable of buying their own candy. If I wanted my itinerary to stand I was going to have to negotiate something far more creative than "1 day at Six Flags and five Aero bars for each of you!"

One day of posing with characters should be plenty for anyone...

Enter the Flash Pass. Six Flags' version of Disney's Fastpass is an electronic ride reservation system that allows you to book a time to ride an attraction from anywhere in the park. You simply scroll up or down to the ride you want to go on and the Flash Pass will tell you what time you can make a reservation for. Press "Reserve", then show up at your appointed time to be allowed to cut in at the front of the line for your chosen attraction. The time you'll have to wait for your reservation depends on which of the three versions of the Flash Pass you buy. The basic Flash Pass figures out the current wait time for an attraction and makes you a reservation for the normal time you would have spent standing in line, so if it was 10 am and you wanted to reserve a ride on Tatsu which had a wait time of 1 hour at that point, you'd be reserving a spot for 11 am. The gold Flash Pass cuts the wait time in half, so your reservation would be for 10:30 am, and the platinum Flash Pass cuts the wait by 90% so you'd be able to ride Tatsu at 10:06 am, which most likely doesn't leave you enough time to walk to the ride as it is.

My kids' objection to only having one day in Six Flags was that the lines can get quite long and it's hard to get on all the great roller coasters in one day if you're there during a busy season. My offer to help them make the most of their one day by buying them the Flash Passes was briefly debated and then accepted, probably with the realization that getting anything out of Dad before he uses his veto power (Otherwise known as the "We can't afford it" card.) is a victory to be proud of. 

It's also possible that they were counting on Dad's inability to resist upgrades. The deal I made with my kids was that I would buy the two who wanted to spend all day on the rides the Gold Flash Pass and they would accomplish as much as they could with only half the wait times. Somewhere along the line I got caught up in the excitement of it all, and when I got to the counter to purchase the Flash Passes I heard the word "Platinum" leave my mouth. Needless to say my kids were very happy and I was somewhat confused as to what just happened. Fortunately, it's a normal state of being for me.

So with their Platinum Flash Passes in hand, my kids set out to plan their conquest of the Magic Mountain roller coaster kingdom. Now it's important to note that not all rides are included in the Flash Pass program. X2, the most insane ride in the park, is only available as an add on to either the Gold or Platinum passes for $15 per ride. The newest roller coaster, Full Throttle, is only available with the Platinum passes, again at a $15 per ride surcharge. Neither of these were happening, so my kids decided to start their day at Batman the Ride, which to their delight was available instantly.

Well kind of instantly. I mean, it took 15 minutes to get across the park to where the ride was located. Then, when they got there, my kids found that there was no line for Batman and they just walked on. It was kind of anti-climatic and I had a moment of wondering if I'd just wasted a bunch of money in an attempt to skip non-existent lines. Fortunately for us (and unfortunately for everybody without Flash Passes) the lines got a fair bit longer as the day went on. 

There were definitely some rides where the Flash Pass worked beautifully. Goliath, one of the biggest, fastest roller coasters in the park was a perfect example. Although the posted wait time was almost an hour, my kids went from making a reservation while standing in front of the ride to actually riding in under five minutes. There were some rides where the Flash Pass didn't work all that well though. Superman, one of my children's favorite rides, was a horrible experience. Even with a reservation, the point where they allow the Flash Passes to cut is still about 20 minutes from the front of the line. Combine that with the fact that Superman has perhaps the worst line organization of any ride in the history of theme parks and it quickly became apparent that the Flash Pass wasn't going to be of any use to us on this ride.

In the end though, our experience with the Flash Passes was a fairly good one. Despite deciding to visit Magic Mountain on a Saturday in the summer and arriving a little late (just after noon), we managed to ride everything in the park as often as we wanted and still finished about an hour before park closing. In the past our visits to Six Flags have ended in three of us wanting to go back to the hotel room while the older two kids wanted to stay right until the last minute to try out "just a few more rides". Being able to leave the park with everybody happy and still beat the closing traffic out of the parking lot was a really nice treat.

Si

So it was convenient, but was it worth it? Flash Passes are a lot of fun, but they're also a bit pricey. A basic Flash Pass costs about $40 per person. Gold will run you $60 per person, and if you're one of those people who get caught up in the excitement like me, a Platinum Pass will set you back $90 per person. There are some small discounts as you add people to the Flash Pass, but you'll still be at least doubling the price of admission. Is that kind of investment a good idea for your group? It was for ours because it kept us from having to buy admission for our family for a second day, but you may be in a different situation. Maybe everybody in your family likes to ride thrill rides. Maybe you've got far more time than you do money. Or in the best case scenario, maybe you can still bribe your kids with candy. As much as I felt the Flash Pass was a good buy for our family, five Aero bars would have been a much cheaper investment.

Written by Steve Pratt




    

The Full Throttle Roller Coaster - A Story in Pictures

This post is a part of Friday Daydreamin at R We There Yet Mom. If you didn't get here from there, you should really go check them out. There's people there who might actually be capable of attending Six Flags without hurting themselves. They must exercise or something.

Written by Steve Pratt