Friday 21 December 2012

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The 9th Day of Christmas - Travel Version

OK, this guy has lost me now. I was a little confused as to what he was getting at when he made gifts out of 23 birds over the course of seven days, but now in the last 48 hours he's brought over 17 people. How is that romantic? I can kind of understand the maids...I mean, who doesn't want somebody else to take care of the housework for them. What's with the dancers though? I guess it might be interesting to watch them for a few minutes, but after that they're pretty much just going to be cluttering up the house. Also, what kind of dancers were they? If they're doing ballet, it should be fairly easy to forget about them. If they're tap dancers, you're going to have a massive headache, and it's really going to play havoc with your floors.

I, on the other hand, am not really interested in receiving nine dancers for Christmas (I've seen Black Swan!). Don't get me wrong...I love dance. It's just that I prefer it in a theater to my living room. When I want to see a great dance performance, I get on a plane and head to Broadway in New York. In fact, I'd go a whole lot more often if it wasn't such a long flight and the hotel rooms weren't so expensive. What a perfect thing to get me for Christmas! You could celebrate Jesus' birth by getting me tickets to see the makers of South Park explain the Book of Mormon to me. I don't see any conflict with that idea do you?

OK, adding the dance steps in 3...2....1....

On the ninth day of Christmas, what you should get for me...

Nine nights in New York,
Eight Cokes for Drinking,
Seven Spots for Surfing,
Six Beaches for Playing,
Five Olympic Rings....
Four Star Wars Angry Birds,
Three Healthy Children,
Two nights at Turtle Bay, and a
Hotel room in a pine tree.

Written by Steve Pratt